Sympathy for the Devil, Compassion for the World

Sympathy for the Devil, Compassion for the World

Years ago, a friend of mine told me a statement he had heard from a girl he knew who was into the goth and S&M scenes: "Sympathy is the most sublime form of torture."

I have always liked this and found it to be true. Even more so since learning about the Law of Attraction and vibration.

Just think of this: with sympathy, in the sense of empathic concern, you are keeping the other person in the vibrational level of their suffering. When you see someone with a broken leg and you say: 'oh, that must really hurt!', you are likely to make them more conscious of the pain they've been or are going through. More of their attention goes to the pain, and in effect it gets worse, and they could even attract more pain. It's a well-meant equivalent of the proverbial rubbing salt in someones wound.

Another problem with sympathy is, is that it feels good when you are receiving it. At first glance, it makes you feel seen, you feel understood. The other person sees your pain and gives you attention. They seem to wish you well, but by drawing attention to the pain are effectively keeping you in that state of suffering, which is what makes it in effect 'sublime' and a 'form of torture'. And it can be highly addictive. I had a friend who manifested constantly health problems and always ever talked about her state of dis-ease, as she was hooked on people giving her sympathy, asking about her health, doctors looking after her. She sometimes sent me about ten messages a day describing me the exact measure of her suffering, and I suspect she did that with other friends as well. Imagine how much time per day is spent focusing on her own suffering every day and reliving it!

So what can you do if you don't want to appear callous? Instead of focusing on the misfortune with exclamations like 'how awful' and 'it's so bad' etc simply wish them well. It's really that easy. It draws the attention to the next better feeling and allows for an upwards spiral. Say 'I hope you'll be feeling better quickly', for example.  

Treat them with compassion rather than sympathy. That way you acknowledge their pain, but implies also the tool to relieve it. To put it in the words of The Buddha: Compassion is that which makes the heart of the good move at the pain of others. It crushes and destroys the pain of others; thus, it is called compassion. It is called compassion because it shelters and embraces the distressed. 

The Australian musician and songwriter John Butler put it this way: Compassion is a call, a demand of nature, to relieve the unhappy as hunger is a natural call for food.

If you are practicing compassion, you wish for others all the good you wish for yourself. Your actions are determined by the understanding of the effect they have on others and the desire for the greatest good for all.

Often, sympathy, empathy and compassion seem to be used interchangeably, but vibrationally, they are very different. Sympathy draws attention to the pain, empathy shares it and compassion acknowledges it and strives for something better.

It is often said that the world needs more compassion, and it's true. If we each treated everyone always with respect and their highest good and well-being in mind, there would be no more wars and crime, because we would be aware of the suffering involved and wish to avoid it. I am sure most people feel that way already, but unfortunately there are still people worldwide driven by hatred, greed and anger.

It is a good practice to make compassion part of your meditation. Here are a few affirmations from the Buddhist practice of lovingkindness and compassion:       

                               May all beings be happy

                               May all beings be safe

                               May all beings be free

I leave the closing words to the Dalai Lama:

If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.

... and finally, some videos to go with today's theme:

The classic 'Sympathy for the Devil' by the Rolling stones

And the amazingly beautiful 'In these Arms, a song for all beings', by Jennifer Berezan

As always, feel free to share and comment!

Love, Light and Healing,

Anya